Lately, I have been thinking why and how relationships end. Before, I used to think people who break up no longer love each other as strong as they used to do. How many times do we actually hear “I don’t love her/him anymore” as a reason for a breakup? From my experience, none.
After experiencing and witnessing, imo, I ranked respect as top 1 cause of relationship breakdown. And when I say respect, I don’t mean between two persons, but from everyone.
I don’t wanna talk about how a man should respect his woman, or vice versa because that’s cliché and I don’t like stating the obvious. I have to talk about how we respect other’s relationship.
We really like to decide for people, don’t we? I don’t know if that’s how the world is, but at least what I used to do. I didn’t get it why must my best friend be with this guy who I don’t like for no particular reason, I just think, he’s not the one. I didn’t think it hurt her whenever I spoke ill of her boyfriend because I thought I was speaking and wanting the best for her. But who was I to decide?
I thought I knew her better and longer. They were together for only 2 years and we have been friends for 5 years. But in that 5 years, my best friend never once treats me the same she does to her boyfriend. No matter how many years I spend time with her, even if we were born right next to each other, I’ll never know her the same as how her boyfriend does. I don’t know her better and longer, I just know her differently than her boyfriend does.
This is the same for your family too. You think you know your sister since she was small, (something that her boyfriend could never do). Well, but surprise! Your sister never once called you baby, or even pours the same love to you as she does to her boyfriend.
It’s not about who’s more than the other, it’s because the nature of ties between friends, siblings, and lovers are all different. And because of this difference, you must respect everyone’s relationship. Because you don’t know everyone as a lover.